March 12, 2444
When I think back to my childhood, my brain only racks up complete and utter darkness. I have no recollection of anything before I was about six years old. It’s an odd feeling, as if every single memory before then has been completely wiped from the depths of my mind. My name is John Sierra or as I am tagged in the military, number 117. Today, all I know and live for is following the orders of my commanding officer. Every day I carry out mission after mission, without as much as a whine of disapproval. I’ve constantly wondered what my purpose in life was, if there really is anything else to life than fighting and following orders. I don’t know what it is, but I will find my true purpose.
March 22, 2444
Today I have been informed that a race other than Humanity exist. The United Nations Military Program (UNMP) has not yet learned enough about this species to even give it a name. Our best scientists and AI (Artificial Intelligence) software have been working tediously, day and night to learn all they can about his new species. So far, all they have to work with is the knowledge that this unknown species is imminently violent. At the first sight of one of our frigates, more specifically, the
May 17, 2444
I was recently told to gather the rest of my squad as we are to be embarking on a very important mission. Our scientists have gotten almost nowhere since my last entry, and Chief Mendallas has briefed us on our mission objectives. The alien species has sent us an encrypted message, which has been decoded and thought to say We are the Sangheili, Humanity is coming to and end. Our objectives were to scavenge what we could of the so called Sangheili technology while fending the alien race off of a human controlled planet in the neighboring solar system.
On another note, I’ve asked Chief Mendallas about where I came from, and why I was here, protecting Humanity. The only he could tell me was that I was part of the UNMP’s program in military defense because I was ‘special’, unlike other children of my time. The rest, he told me, was classified.
May 30, 2444
Our recent mission was a success, as always, it seems that we succeed at everything, which is good, right? I’ve been told many times we always win. With the new data my squad and I were able to gather, the scientists and AI’s working on learning about the Sangheili culture has made a huge leap forward. We have almost been able to fully replicate the alien’s energy shields that surround their ships using small scale shields found during our mission that they often carry. But all of these discoveries do not matter. We have not been able to apply them to any of our ships or combat armor, so it’s not of much use at the moment. At this very moment, the Sangheili are attacking. They’ve destroyed over half of the UNMP fleet we have sent out to defend while we’ve only been able to destroy a few of their ships.
August 2, 2444
The Sangheili have been relentlessly attacking for months now, depleting our defensive ships to almost nothing. We tried to fall back to a far away planet called Xanus, but it seems as if the Sangheili have planned for this. As we were departing to Xanus, they somehow placed a tracking probe onto our frigate. They located us within days and wiped out nearly three-fourths of the planets twelve million people. Things don’t seem to be going very well at all. Almost every military personnel in the UNMP are not showing the slightest bit of optimism. For now all we can do is defend and try to muster a plan to gain a victory, which should help build morale among everyone.
September 13, 2444
Planning for the next big mission had been underway for little over a month. Chief Mendallas has informed me that I will be leading this mission, but the costs could be significant. He has not yet told me what I am to do. He tells me this may just be the most deadly mission yet, but if successful, the most beneficial. I have also been told I am the man to do it.
October 1, 2444
Well, this is it; the mission planning has been completed. I have just come from the briefing room and this mission does not in any way sound easy, but hey, haven’t I always loved a challenge? My squad and I are to capture, not destroy an enemy ship in the Eridanus Solar System, where a huge battle is raging at this moment. We then have to eliminate the crew and find a way to have the ship take us back to their home planet. We are then to find their leader and bring it back alive to our scientists so they can try to negotiate some peace treaty or alliance. It seems that that is our only hope right now.
Is this what I am meant to be? A tool, a soldier? Throughout my life, I have been told countless times to follow orders, kill first and ask questions later.
I have to leave now, this is where my journal ends, I may not come back from this mission alive, but I think I finally know what my purpose in life is: I am meant to serve and protect Humanity.
7 comments:
I liked your story Kyle. Although I usually do not like stories of this genre I liked this one. I think the plot and was good and you described the character very well. I thought it was interesting that the main character accepted that he may have to die for his country fighting wars but he still wanted to fight.
my personal reaction was it was suspencful and wasn't really solved a the end.
the main character doesn't really change because he remains a soldier during the entire story and if that changed humanity would die.
my favorite part was the end because the main character figured out his purpose on earth.
the best quality is the detail. there is perfect detail so you know what is happening.
next time i think that you should put more in about what the main character looks like.
Kyle L- Great story Steven King. This story seemed like a sci-fi movie about the future where aliens come and take over the planet. But that’s not quite the same as your story because your character is trying to rehabilitate the aliens. I thought it was cool how the liquid plasma attacked the women. It is a good message to send that people don’t really know their purpose in life and that it is hard to figure out what your destiny was, or is. The entire story was very suspenseful and filled with tons of action along with great detail. But I was wondering if people in 1000 years will still talk like we do.
I found that this story was very enjoyable. It made me think about playing Halo 3 with friends on Xbox Live. Over the course of the story the main character begins to question the purpose of his life and why he was a soldier. He eventually finds his purpose.
My favorite part of the story was near the end of the story, where he describes his mission. "My squad and I are to capture, not destroy an enemy ship in the Eridanus Solar System, where a huge battle is raging at this moment." is an example of the exciting action in this section.
I think that this story's overall best quality was that it did not have a normal story structure. It seemed like the entire story kept building up and ended right before tha climax. It made me want a sequel.
In your next short story, I would try to make the format more exciting. The journal-style writing is interesting, but it can get stale if there is no first person action. Even writing journal entries that take place in the middle of an emergency would make it more exciting.
Hey Kyle,
I thought your story was cool. It reminded me of the book Ender’s Game because he was saving the world from aliens. I liked how you made it as a journal, and I liked how it was sci-fi. I have to say that making it journal-like was kind of copying one of the short stories that we had an option to read for homework, but it’s your story, and you probably just liked that idea. Maybe you could have been a little bit more creative with it. I also like how you didn’t use many conjunctions in your story. It made it seem more like a serious journal, and not just a diary.
I think it’s pretty cool that you ended it near the climax. My favorite line was, “…I may not come back from this mission alive, but I think I finally know what my purpose in life is: I am meant to serve and protect Humanity.” It ends the story well, and sums up what was happening to the main character internally. The main character didn’t change too much. He decided that he knew what his purpose was, and that he wasn’t going to ask many more questions about his past or reason to live.
Something that I think you should work on is just re-reading. I caught a couple of words missing when I was reading. Also, I thought that there was more description than plot to your story. Although that’s okay, having more action next time would make your story more interesting.
Hemmm...Combining "The Ordnance" with Halo. Well, I can't say it's original, but I like it none the less. Did you read the halo books?
The stories are almost parralell. But I still like it. Good Job!!
Finish the fight!
Very good short story. It has a very nice plot, and the journal entries have a real feel to the story. The main character does change overtime, with him realizing what his purpose was, and seeing why he is needed to the human race. My favorite part was the resolution. It was a really nice wrap-up to the journal entries. The part where it stated that he was meant to protect humanity was a very good part and quote. The tale’s best quality was the journal writing style. One piece of advice I would suggest is that the journal entries had to be more informative. Some questions you should ask to John Sierra is what he looks like, and what he is told to do, and to write instead more about himself.
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