In modern day society, value is discerned a lot differently than it was a long time ago. Today people take a lot of things for granted and don’t value the real important things in life. We may say that we really value our ipods, computer, or something else of numerical value. Nowadays, value is determined mainly by how much it costs. But if you really think about, way back when these kinds of things didn’t exist and people didn’t have much money, they valued things such as times spent with their family or watching the sun set. They didn’t have a whole lot of money to go out and buy something that would entertain them. Back, probably a few decades ago, value was determined not by the cost of something, but by the sentimental value it brought them.
I am no different than anyone else today about valuing most, something that had cost me a lot of money. To me, that thing right now is my computer. Before my family got an up-to-date computer, it was hard for me to get research projects done and I was also pretty bored when there was nothing on TV. Now, I use it almost every single day for homework that I don’t understand or to play games on. It is a Dell Home Edition with Windows XP. The model is Dimension 4600 and it is black. We have a normal size flat screen with adjustable bass speakers. It runs very smoothly, not too much lag and fits nicely on my desktop. The most fun I have ever had on my computer was when I first got it and was setting it up. Nobody else knew what to do so I tinkered with it and set up everything and it was a blast. My computer really helps make my life easier.
Although I do value items of numerical value, there are other things that are important to me. Something I value a lot that is priceless, are my friends. One in particular is Brandon Tetrault. I’ve been friends with him since third grade, when I really didn’t have any friends. I always enjoy hanging out with him after school and on the weekends. To one another, our houses are like a second home to the other. Some great times we’ve had together were when we would pull pranks on his mom and the time he caught this huge bass in the
My computer and my friends are both things that I value. If I had to choose one thing between the two of them, I don’t know what I would pick. Of course friends don’t have a cost and bring a lot of fun, and a computer allows you to surf the web, and you can chat with your friends online without having to leave your house. I guess I would choose my friends because compared to a computer, you can still chat with them, but in person, but you can also hang out and see a movie or whatever you and your friends do. Online on a computer, you can’t really do those kinds of things. The mind-blowing moments I have with my friends, like when I complete a mission on Halo 3 and unlock a new achievement, give me a great feeling that I can’t get rid of, are way more valuable to me than anything I could accomplish on the computer. I also don’t have to pay when I want to go to my friend’s house like I would for a computer game.
The way people consider and discern value today is a lot different than how it used to be. Using what I’ve been thinking about value, I’ve considered that value shouldn’t be recognized by how much something costs. It should be about what the object or feeling means to you. I value my friends over my computer not just because it seems like it should be the right thing to do, but because my friends are a lot more fun to hang out with than a computer.
7 comments:
I really enjoyed this essay. i thought it was very good. especially the introduction. I think it was the strongest part of this essay. Derek H
Really nice Kyle. Very strong beginning paragraph and very strong last paragraph. for the computer, you are telling mr rather then showing. there is some showing but not enough. With your priceless thing, it is very interesting about what you did with Brandon, and very informative.
What i would suggest is that you should have more body in your essay.You should equalize your essay. some areas can be more strong then others, but really nice essay Kyle, great job!
This was a really well written essay. There were some big words that i didn't understand. I liked the way you described everything to put a picture in my head. Another thing i liked was the introduction. You really described the computer well. I found it very interesting that Brandon caught a 2 foot long bass. I didn't think there was anything wrong with this essay. Great job kyle.
I liked all of the information about your computer and what you do on it. Your introduction and your information on your computer was very solid and well written. I liked how you described what you do with Brandon. That must have been a really big fish that you caught.
I think tat you could have said a little more things about what you do with Brandon. Overall it was a very good essay.
What you seem to be saying is valuable is what someone finds happiness in. The things that you most strongly value are your computer and your friends. The value that you described in this essay most vividly and clearly was when you talked about your friends. This was your priceless value. The part that had a lot of description in it was when you talked about fishing.
In general, your essay's overall strengths were your writing style. It was all you. It was very different. Next time try lengthening your conclusion.
I like this essay.
I can't find any spelling or grammar errors. Some words were used a little too often and could have been replaced by more descriptive creative words and some sentences were a little confusing, but they were all small things.
The opening paragraph compares and contrasts types of value and how our idea of it has changed ofer time. The supporting paragraphs give good examples of what things are valuable to you, why, and how. They are written well and lead into eachother well, showing good organization.
I really got a sense of why you value your friends and computer for different reasons.
I liked the addition of the second to last paragraph, which sums up the 2 above supporting paragraphs and compares and contrasts them.
That left the conclusion with the sol perpose of complementing/ concluding the opening paragraph, whch I think it did well. All the questions about value were answered and it sounded as if writing this essay made you think yourself about value and what you hold valuable. Good essay!!
Hi Kyle,
I likedyour essay.Youdescribed your computer to much. Your intro and conclusion was pretty good. I didn't find anything else wrong with it though.
Post a Comment